Everybody’s Having One

I may have missed the point somehow
it seems there’s something going down
bursting through are grand awakenings
on the street all over town

I can sense a tense of eagerness
a sort of tasteful hyper charge
among the trendy chic and fashionable
the latest thing with those at large

The crux it seems is quite old hat
a tired long gone theophany
its widespread use is odd abstruse
A glib clichéd  epiphany

I suppose it used to be something like 
'You'll never guess what?' 
Nowadays it is more often  "Said Bethany to Tiffany I must share my OMG epiphany."

Of Words In Deep Water

I hear the songs

I hear the voices

I hear the words

of limited choices

I hear the bleeding
I hear the pleading 
I hear the yielding
words of needing

I hear resistance
I hear the slaughter
I hear the rising tide
Of words in deep water

Breakfast Headlines

Who’s doing what to whom right now
as we hear it on the news
the lovely pair in the comfy chair
ring out loud our daily blues

Everything that’s most atrocious
in a gift wrapped smiley frame
they hotly grill the expert
with interruptions laying blame

One wonders why they call them in
So little is revealed
blithely butting in aggressively
rancid comments news congealed

So let’s get on we super two
flirty fluttery cuddly views
Ensuring misery disperses
on breakfast cereal sugary news

The Coffee House Louse

Cheap Shots! Not in our coffee.

Starbucks are not happy

with David Cameron it seems

a clot has soured the coffee cup

it may impact investment schemes

Pouring ice in Starbucks coffee

a most pleasant thing to do

although a carping Mr Cameron

adds too much salt into the stew

Wake up and smell the coffee

a cheap shot chasing cash

it’s not good sense politically

to give employment hopes a bash

Our Mayor of London’s steaming

at the Cameron coffee cloud

weighing heavy on the bevy

is affecting Starbucks crowd

By George! Plan B?? Who Me??

On matters economically

and all thing monetarily
lies vain intractability
sagging lagging dilatorily

The Chancellor most verily
does not do arbitrarily
alternatives contrarily
leave him hanging on foolhardily

No plan ‘B’ he mentions cockily
for he thinks he’s most almightily
content with gross austerity
extremely right audacity

Great fun doing this rhyme. Using newspaper articles and a web I often use:

 Rhyme Zone Link

The Table

The table waits to be defined

employed in many ways

to eat or write to just sit tight

play games on rainy days

For gatherings of families

or terse negotiation

so important is the table

for the sake of declaration

As I Was Saying

 Oxford Dictionary Link

I almost missed 'word of the day' yesterday 'Doryphore'

 A Word In Your Ear - Terrific Web

So always first to criticise

pragmatic unromantic

to nitpick every minor point 

a doctrinaire pedantic

Plodding out and spouting forth

as might a pointless crashing bore

condemning truth unfathomable

pray silence say no more

Raining down resentful spears

verbal ranting septic spore

your arrows dulled have fallen blunt

no one is listening ‘Doryphore’

The Awkward Conjecture

 PICTURE LINK

Misplaced assumptions

Cause misunderstandings

Laden with risky effect

For positions demanding

More closer inspection

May indicate lack of respect

The vanished perspective

Gains no reward

Opinion seemingly senseless

To be spurned or ignored

Without explanation

A pose exposed as defenceless

The Exonerated Goat

 PICTURE & STORY LINK

Jimbo Bazoobi has the goat

They’ve tested him in law

with horticultural predilections

His goat prefers a cultured gnaw

Chomping local  pansy’s

gnashing orchids as a treat

a rustic ruminant bon vivant

every crocus at its feet

The case has been contested

favouring Jimbo and the billy

the goat now vindicated

Leaves prosecution looking silly

The Feathered Bed of Bunco

Accountants' survey finds employee fraud doubled in a year as Britons 'seek to feather their nests'

Read more: http://www.theweek.co.uk/business/51116/fraud-britain-reaches-new-high-says-kpmg-survey#ixzz2IjMNx1Vi

 Picture Link

Whoever you rub shoulders with

in the City where you linger

a well drawn sword of corporate fraud

amid The Hood and Crooked finger

Your padded pockets fill your quilt

with ‘self fulfilled’ duck down

as you quaff and scoff ill gotten gains

never pausing once to frown

You stand their proud invincible

amazed at how you think

no time for whingeing loser tales

not even noticing the stink

No Bones about Flintstones

The wealthy folk of Saudi

such amazing choice of bling

crystal esplanades supreme

so up to date with everything

Lavish splendid palisades

adorn with condescension

treasures won from fossil fuel

dinosaurs one best not mention

Dinosaurs are worrying those

from the C-P-V-P-V

promoting virtuous vice prevention

where only ignorance is free

Massive evidence of dinosaurs

causing thought police to hustle

imposing ludicrous restrictions

flexing inquisition’s muscle

NEWS LINK

PICTURE LINK

The Cock Eyed Optimist

Looking on the bright side

from time to time you might

ignoring minuses and negatives

and all sorts out of sight

Cheering up and grinning

when you feel you may well cry
smiling when you’re furious
upfront bravely with a sigh

Seize the opportunity

where difficulties lie
that was Albert Einstein
don’t give up just have a try

Gone to Waste

This picture belongs to Deviant Art

The monumental trash bin

A testament to waste

Full of remnants now discarded

Once thought of as good taste

They stand there in my garden

An extension of my palace

On hot days smelly rancid

Life's plastic poisoned chalice

If they could speak they'd tell us

About the stuff we throw away

Like unnecessary packaging

Sucking blood from hard earned pay

Pseudologia Fantastica

 Picture Link - Worth a visit

Along the way you may have met

some folk who spin a line

they speak of most amazing feats

weird facts that intertwine

The tale is told emphatically 

no chance it may be true

with astonishing incredulity

verbal trickery they imbue

This artless verbal flatulence

one may never ascertain

pathologically fictitious

almost certainly insane

Mythomania Wikipedia Link

How well it can the Pelican

This neat poem about a Pelican was brought to my notice recently. It is written by Dixon Lanier Merritt (1879 – 1972). Edward Lear also wrote a nonsense verse and song about the Pelican. Merritt's poem seems to be the last word on Pelicans so I thought I would consult a few rhyming aids and have a go myself.
(As beneath the picture below)

A wonderful bird is the pelican,
His bill will hold more than his belican,
He can take in his beak
Enough food for a week
But I'm darned if I see how the hellican!

How well it can the Pelican

Most gregarious the water bird Pelican

with a pouch the size of a jerry can

cooperative feeder colonial breeder

when in flight is far from pedestrian

Such a wonder the avian Pelican
guzzles much more than a Gannet can
Soar glide or skim whatever its whim

so quick of the mark this antelucan

(Antelucan: of the time just before daybreak)
I know very little about Pelicans apart from that John Grisham novel.
The special info included here was taken from Wikipedia Link

Empty Holes of Plenty

Picture Link

When the keepers of the fairway
check the score with eagle eyes
and Rory with his clubhouse cheque
Has eyes on Tigers prize

As price defines what fans must wear
well placed orders from the brand
just in case you’re not on message
the hype will help you understand

The golfer swing a fad in-thing
whether Callaway Cobra Ping
for one hundred fifty million
we so prefer the Nike thing

The badge is now the powerhouse
with or without it feel the sneer
and if the payout is phenomenal
Tell them McIlroy was here

NEWS Link 150 million reasons

Morning Glory Supper

Taking chancy unsafe bets
when eating on the hoof
if there’s an even money option
you’d do well to ask for proof

The bookies favourite burger
if you like to study form
in the bag it’s a one horse race
takes the Bobtail Nag by storm

When eating at a canter
try a real backwoodsman treat
sink deep those Billy Bob gnashers
‘spread a plate’ of galloping meat

Bar-b-Q’s are serious things
on the global wending way
a manly sling on the griddle brings
no radish sauce horse play

Equine Burger's - News Link

Spicey Dicey Catastrophe

Chinese billionaire dies after eating poisoned cat stew

kicks off a year of poisoners.

‘Two O Twelve’ a venomous year

be careful what you eat

whether vegetables or pastries

or some unsuspecting meat

Long Liyuan the billionaire 

had chomped his final chew

a sprinkled dose of heartbreak grass

that got him in a stew

It seems there’d been embezzling

somebody nicked some cash

and as a method of repayment

put Gelsemium in the mash

Unlike that gal from Brisbane

who polluted her pal’s cookie

Long Liyuan the billionaire 

had a preference for pussy

It tastes like bunny rabbit

I’ve heard many people say

they served a dish of hot pot foul

a cats revenge that day

POISON PUSS NEWS LINK